Dear Ms. Critic,
I see you for the incredible force that you are.
You’ve been with me for as long as I can remember and I know you’ve been relentless for decades, never giving up on helping me, and you are damn good at your job.
You’re the one who kept me moving when I wanted to freeze. The one who demanded more from me when I thought I couldn’t give it. The one who pushed me to figure things out, to be sharper, faster, stronger. You’ve kept me safe. You are the reason I never fall short, never get lazy, never lose my grip. You gave me that edge—the one that got me here. I know I wouldn’t have built what I’ve built, achieved what I’ve achieved, or survived what I’ve survived without you.
Thank you for being steadfast. Thank you for seeing all the capacity I had in myself, especially what I couldn’t see in myself.
I know your intentions were seeded in love, but I need you to know that I am enough.
I know this might sound strange, but I don’t need to outrun failure or grind myself into dust to prove I’m worthy. I don’t need to push so hard that I forget to breathe. I don’t need to be “better” every time I pause to rest. I don’t need to earn my value.
I know you think that if you stop pushing, I’ll stop growing, but I won’t because you taught me that I am capable of anything. I just need you to hear that capable of anything is not the same as capable of everything. I can no longer live in a continual state of rush, burnout, tension, and pain.
I’m not asking you to leave. I know you’re an essential part of me. Your instincts have always been sharp, and I trust that if I ever need to fight hard again, you’ll be right there, ready to help me rise. But for now, I need you to loosen your grip. I need you to step back and let me show you all I have learned. I need you to believe in me the way I have always believed in you. You don’t have to prove my worth anymore. You don’t have to fill the silence with “more” and “better” every time I pause. I promise I’ll still show up. I’ll still push when it matters. I’ll still chase what I care about. Trust me. And while I use your wisdom to navigate the world with more independence, please rest–you deserve it.
I love you, Ms. Critic. Thank you.
With gratitude,
Me
